‘Do you, Gobshite, take this Boss Bird to be your awful wedded wife?’
‘G’wan then.’

Don’t Tell the Bride is looking for Scousers to create comedy gold. Couples will receive £14,000 – that’s £2000 more than the last series – to spend on their big day.

The only condition is that the bloke must organise EVERYTHING, i.e. make sure the bride wants to rip his bollocks off for our entertainment. If he knows what’s good for him, he’ll spend that 14 grand on a gown by Thelma Madine.

To apply visit the Renegade Pictures website. It’ll be a laugh.